Exhausted with life but still fighting...

I'm sorry you are going through that.  I understand how you feel. I feel like my sole purpose is to take care of everyone else, but there is never anyone there for me. I will say antidepressants can help. I had to go off mine when I found out I was pregnant, I can tell my depression is much worse without them.  

@Sadpanda1122 Ditto. To the having to take care of everything. I haven’t tried anti depressants. To be honest I have only started to face up to my problems now. Stay strong for your kids. I draw my strength from mine.

Hi @Kopite79‍ I know where you are coming from... I feel like all I do is work and work and work and then never have time to enjoy. I also feel like you that I am afraid to speak with partner about my feelings and just keep waking up day to day to make money, but I do not want to be where I am at. 

It is depressing in itself... I wishI could start over. How can you just walk away though once you are together?

@depressedme Bloody good question... When my wife and I had a period when we were separated about 9 years ago, I was crushed. She moved on, after close to a year, I tried. Unfortunately, Because of my daughter, we were constantly seeing each other. So I never got over her. Now here we are again, and she is telling me were done. That she has no feelings for me whatsoever. We are never ever going to happen. I cannot except that. Living in the same house as her is tormenting. Knowing she is on the phone to her new friend is torture. When I look at how she treats me, and how I think she see's me, there should be no hope. I should be wanting to leave her. But you can't control your feelings. Ultimately I think we are bad for each other. I think she may have issues as well, and instead of talking to each other about them we blame each other for them, or for not fixing them. There are many triggers to my depression, and she unknowingly does a lot of those. Despite all of this, I don't think I would be able to walk away. I am sure if we had the money, she would. If she meets the right person, I fear she would leave me to it and make up home with them, as she will no longer need me. I guess if one of the partners wants out, Its over. But sometimes I just have this feeling that she's not thinking straight. That we have not been getting on recently because we have both been so stressed. Other times I look at myself and what I need to change so that she loves me. Was I too much of a pushover? Did she not love me because she had no respect for me? Is it because I am boring? Was I not good enough for her sexually? and endless other questions. You can see how I see myself, and one of my greatest fears is that I have isolated myself for so long that I don't know how to socialize/communicate properly. Not on whats real. Leading to my biggest fear - Am I just broken???

You can see from my response that I am about as much use a a chocolate teapot. I don't think you can make the decision unless you are thinking clearly. Time apart could be a good thing, not a break where you see others.New relationships always have that excitement at the start that would rose tint the new and darken the old.

Do you miss spending time with them?