What causes or triggers your depression?

Hello. Thank you for this discussion. I really feel down. Recently, in my country, many cute children were killed cruelly. 2 days ago, a 10-year old boy waiting for his school bus was kidnapped and the murderer killed him with knives attack. When I think that a little boy in the morning was ready to go school and maybe he did not even eat his breakfast. Why nobody could help his!!! How that man could do this!! Why did this happen? .This kinds of thoughts make me crazy. I feel insecure and now I am writing I am weeping. I cannot tolerate this disaster. Unfortunately in my country monthly you face lots of violence again children. I cannot make myself calm down.

@mehramizm931‍, I am so sorry that happened. What country do you live in?

Do you suffer from depression from this incidents because of the country you live in?

I do not know why I eventually came down with depression/anxiety. It happened spontaneously in high school. I was popular and then all of the sudden I did not perform well in one my athletic events... I could not skate. I kept falling down. It was like my mind was playing with me. IT was very weird.

Then ever since then I became more introverted and stopped playing athletics. Now certain things can trigger my depression / anxiety, which are usually thinking about things that happened to me in my past or even in the day. I over think about it and then I start to think about everything that has happened to me and I gt overwhelmed and become very anxious and then later depressed.

Being around or seeing my old friends causes me to feel really down. I try and avoid them but they are everywhere I go! My friends now try and help me but I’ve been through so much and I don’t think anything can help now.

@Fin4ever‍, I hear you! I feel the same way. Seeing my friends do things that I used to be able to do pre-injury or hearing them talk about going to the gym or doing things I used to love to do.

I had a really bad injury and I just cant do what I used to do and I cant defend myself like I used to or anything... it takes some time. 

What are you going through that being around your friends triggers your depression? If you would like to share that is. We are here for you.

Thoughts and paranoia surrounding my wife. I never let her know, but it’s starting to be too much to handle on my own.

i feel inadequacy, jealousy and what have you. I’m running out of options at age 44. This depression is crippling.

The answers depend on what kind of problem you are facing. As for me, I'm lonely. I don't get the love I thought I deserve from parents, so I started looking for it in the people who I thought could make me feel loved. But everything can go wrong, and will go wrong.

Everyone eventually disappoints every other, and that could make someone deeply hurt. That is, in my case; what I'm dealing with. My family's in a bit complicated state, my own life begs to be off, friends are also one of the cause. I've had hard times trusting them because I know how they talk about other people behind their back- how they don't want to deal with a friend who's emotionally hurt. They stabbed me behind my back. 

So I have three reasons; family (my personal life at home), love (as in guys), and friends.. And sometimes it triggers me when this has become a cause that distracts me from being able to focus in class. Seeing everyone else work their way to getting their pen in the pencil case- solving Mathematics equations. And I just sit there, silently crying inside that I want to go home, punch my pillow and scream "I just can't do it!" My face looks calm and peaceful, but truly it is a mad chaos inside. 

I always think of giving up; suicide. But that wouldn't be so nice. I'm not thinking of suicide as a coward way of escaping problems, even though indeed it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I just still care about the family; people would think they raised me wrongly.My friends would say I take things too seriously when things can be work out. And me doing suicide would hurt my parents so bad, that is if they ever cared at all. But I know they do. I believe so, even though they rarely see me. Even though they left me waiting at school for 3 hours to be picked up, I know they care. 

I wouldn't want to leave the world with guilt, and regret washing over me, realizing that time couldn't be turn over. Even if living can be more painful that dying, I still want to live. My empty eyes somehow hopes to see rays of sunshine at the end of this dark tunnel.

I just want to escape from time, escape from all the bad, dark, depressing things in life and skip to only the good part. 

Not sure what triggers depression sometimes. That is what is so scary for me sometimes and causes a lot of anxiety!

@Simoniff‍ - have you spoken to her about this? Has there been a reason to cause the concerns?

@l0n3ly‍, please, know that there are people who care for you and that you can speak openly on this forum to other who are going through similar issues. However, please always know that there is a suicide hotline (1-800-273-8255) that you should call if the thoughts are overwhelming. Also seeking medical treatment or speaking to a counselor may be of help.