I don't want to be anywhere at all

yes!! I feel this way a lot of times. Espically when I feel the world is caving in on me. I just wanna run. I don't know why or where, I just wanna go. I wanna leave everything behind but I can't I have two children that  depend on me.

I understand also!!!  I want to be anywhere but here!  I pose the question "If money weren't an issue and you could jump on a plane right this minute, where would you go"?  I have yet to answer.  I feel the world is a joke.  Or maybe I'm the one with the problem...I have never had the same desire for success like other people.   It all seems meaningless. 

Aghh.. I still can't shake this stupid f***ing feeling like everything is just a joke. Like, remember the Truman Show? Like, not that I'm in a literal TV show, but like how everything isn't real. Maybe a better way to explain it is that I can't wait until the next life. Like whatever comes next, because I'm so tired of the way this one is going. I feel so hypervigalent about everything that I can't handle the realness of how fake the world feels and how life feels. 

I can relate. Some days I dont want to be stuck at home and sometimes I cant stand the thoughts of going out. When im home its like friends will say where do you want to go? All I can say is anywhere but here. Once a destination has been chosen its like I shutdown and end up going nowhere.