Being blamed for depression

@Marielilly Hi Marielilly, thank you for starting this discussion. I'm sorry to hear your husband is not understanding of your depression. Let me tag some other members who may be able to share their thoughts with you.

Hi everyone, how are you doing? Do you feel like your loved ones understand your depression? Have you ever been blamed for your own depression? What did you do? What can Marielilly do to help her husband understand? Do you have any advice ?
@Kiki01‍ @Deelish58‍ @Wickedlovely54‍ @stephanieb73‍ @tommiera13‍ @JenM2020‍ @Crazybeaut1ful71‍ @Hotstuff473271212‍ @Blueacegirl2020‍ @Cutemouse1216‍ @junegirl55‍ @Lisaf3‍ @BrinleysGma‍ @Jackie07‍ 

Take care,
Courtney

@Marielilly‍ My husband nor anyone in my family really believes that I have depression b/c they don't seem to believe it really exists so I kind of know how u feel.  And I'm really sorry u have to go through this kind of pain on top of the depression.  I'm going through a divorce as we speak due to my issues with depression and the unfortunate way I chose to deal with it (alcohol).  But maybe u can see if ur husband would be willing to go to therapy with u so u can at least see if u can get past it.  U definitely don't want to divorce without knowing that u at least exhausted all of ur options.  That way, no matter what happens, at least u know u tried ur best.  I do hope that u at least are going to therapy on ur own.  Idk if this helped at all but I do hope it gets better for u soon!  

I go to thearpy it helps alot I asked him to go with me he said no he said he would go by himself  he hadn't did it yet .he never goes through with what he says I beginning to resent him 

@Marielilly‍ yes, I understand completely.  My husband went with me once, didn't like the fact that they weren't just automatically taking his side (b/c they don't take sides) so refused to go back.  He now thinks I'm just paying them to tell me what I want to hear.  Ridiculous!  Anyway, this isn't about me and my issues.  I really hope you can figure things out and hopefully it will be before you truly start to resent him!  I wish there were some encouraging words that I could give you but honestly, I have nothing, yet!  I'll keep checking back though and see if you're okay.  

Thank you for being there you  can talk to me anytime 

@Marielilly‍  I just may have to because yesterday my husband told me that he wants to try to work things out but now tonight he just informed me that he's leaving and is going to his Mom's in another state and he has no clue how long he'll be gone or if he's even going to come back.  I know that his family will definitely try to talk him into actually going through with the divorce and moving there with them because they hate me.  They loved me until we got married and then all of a sudden felt like I "took" him away.  Even though he still saw them all of the time and I barely saw my family!  I'm scared because I really do love him so much and I'm scared to be left on my own because I don't trust myself.  Not to mention he's leaving me with no money, no car, no food and no water.  I'm not working because Noone is hiring and because he never wanted me to.  Idk... I'm a huge mess right now!  I'm not use to being away from him!  Sorry, I know ur having a very difficult time too so I don't mean to make this about me.  I hope u had a better day today!  

@Marielilly‍  and FYI u can talk to me any time as well.  I don't sleep much so I'm always checking on here.  

Thank you so much

My mental health is completely impaired and I don’t even know what to do with it. This happened after two months of self-isolation. I didn’t even think that after giving up walking and working from home, my life would become so unbearable. I just love an active lifestyle and it was just hell for me. Over time, I decided to use antidepressants, but the effect was negative and I had health problems. After that, I decided that by all means I could cope with my depression and after advising in various forums I decided to try kratom. You won’t believe it, but it really helped me. I found a great supplier [link removed by Moderator for violation of community standards] and they sell very high quality kratom.

In my family it's believed depression is a choice, a way of thinking. I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 at 27 after I could not kick my post-partom depression. I have always had lows and highs but this was different all I wanted to do was sleep and I couldn't concentrate for my life. Just getting dressed to go to work, daily house work and mommy duties kicked me under.  Anyway, after my diagnosis which is considered a mental illness. I was/am looked at differently by my family. They agreed with the symptoms completely but the stigma was too much to welcome. My depression is hard for me and harder for my family. Depression is not logical or forgiving. When I am in my depressed states which is normally 8- months out of the year... I can be a "stick in the mud".. Or a " Loner" As my family has labeled me. They do not understand why my energy levels, and tolerance for explaining myself decrease. It becomes my fault for not working harder on myself or in their minds not being consistent. " Here we go again" I hear this often. Or " Why are you like this".... I can tell you I have explained to my family Bipolar in definition, my medication side effects, or medication changes and me just being me. In the end it's always my fault. I'm told "I need to try harder." I do agree to some level. I agree I have to keep trying new things to find what best works for me... And that I always have a choice in my thoughts and behaviors. I have accepted this outlook from my family. I'm 47..it did take time to acceptance and knowledge. I guess what I want to say is...Even those who you expect more from are not always going to understand you or understand where you are coming from. What I have learned is it's not my job to explain depression to my loved ones and hope they understand and except me. Im the only one who really needs to be at peace with my mental health and what  that means to me is this battle is my own. I have good days and bad days. I choose my battles. Depression is my battle... Not my family.  Wishing everyone strength and commitment to your own well being.