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Survivor's guilt: How do you heal and find meaning in life after cancer?
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BeckyPelissier
BeckyPelissier
Last activity on 12/18/2024 at 3:35 AM
Joined in 2019
Had breast cancer in 2018. I'm on hormon pills another 4 years. But honestly don't think my body gonna last that long. I found out this year I have chronic pancreas problems. Gastroparesis. Almost 1 point away from stage 2 liver disease. I have a Gen mutation. . I had a pre cancer palups in my colon. I have go back in 2025 have another lower GI. 2 day prep. I found this all out this year 2024. I lost my baby brother in a car accident in 08/2024. . My life been really rough this year it took toll on me this year..
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DCline3dogs
I completely understand as I don’t have anyone to talk to also. I’m a widow & I live alone. My oldest son died in 2021 & my youngest son & his family live 3 hours. My father is dead & my mother has chronic back pain & is immobile. My younger sister lives with our mother & she is going through a divorce from her husband who abandoned her. My sister doesn’t visit me, help me, call me & rarely texts me. I have various cousins, a niece & nephew that are spread out in nearby states but are hours away from me. After I told my friends I had cancer, they quit contacting me. I have learned how to be my own care giver. It has been very difficult. I’ll admit I’ve been depressed, cried a lot, felt sorry for myself but I never gave up. I prayed & read my Bible everyday. Then I found cancer groups online like this one where I could share what I was going through & got empathetic responses. That really kept me going. I hope you find someone to talk to but I highly recommend the online cancer chat groups.
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DCline3dogs
I completely understand as I don’t have anyone to talk to also. I’m a widow & I live alone. My oldest son died in 2021 & my youngest son & his family live 3 hours. My father is dead & my mother has chronic back pain & is immobile. My younger sister lives with our mother & she is going through a divorce from her husband who abandoned her. My sister doesn’t visit me, help me, call me & rarely texts me. I have various cousins, a niece & nephew that are spread out in nearby states but are hours away from me. After I told my friends I had cancer, they quit contacting me. I have learned how to be my own care giver. It has been very difficult. I’ll admit I’ve been depressed, cried a lot, felt sorry for myself but I never gave up. I prayed & read my Bible everyday. Then I found cancer groups online like this one where I could share what I was going through & got empathetic responses. That really kept me going. I hope you find someone to talk to but I highly recommend the online cancer chat groups.
See the best comment
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Somya.P
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Somya.P
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Last activity on 12/18/2024 at 3:50 PM
Joined in 2023
429 comments posted | 20 in the Cancer Forum
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Hello everyone,
How are you feeling today?
Many cancer survivors carry a surprising and heavy burden: guilt. Even after treatments are over and health improves, it’s common to feel conflicted. You may wonder, “Why me? Why did I survive when others didn’t?” or feel guilt about how the illness has impacted your loved ones. For some, there’s even a sense of not living up to the second chance they’ve been given.
This “survivor guilt” is normal, but that doesn’t make it easier. It’s tied to a deep need to make sense of the trauma and find fairness in something so unfair. Some survivors find themselves comparing their journey to others’, minimizing their own struggles because someone else had it “worse.” Others might feel sadness or helplessness when thinking about those still in treatment or those they’ve lost.
One survivor shared how she dealt with these feelings by finding purpose in connection. She supported another young woman with leukemia, sending her care packages and encouragement, saying, “The worst thing for me would be feeling like I wasn’t doing anything to help someone else.” Small acts like this can help turn guilt into something positive.
Let’s open up about this:
@Gordon @dorisj @Survivor @Denella @Bobgrun @Zuccaro @Sjwmama @Bluestreak1 @Ckiley @marlajf @ShelleBelle45 @Justme @HawaiianLau @Martha @shhiggins326 @angelagayer @Dayle527 @Rosamaria @BeckyPelissier @Jolihemi5 @Megs90 @TashaBbgg @sbake001 @chuprin @Ginger54 @Jillhall @Lumppy @Pdiddy21 @LisaKent @Gaither57 @Kumac585 @Maria94 @Bemitch53 @Helen54 @Cmajer @heartroot @Janice547 @Ukrlucky @Susanleigh @Bubbie @Bmlynch102 @kitwhit @Annhofmann260 @BethTen @Shewchik @Betio68 @DonnaKay @Bonnie1 @Bbarbee @mrjoe1948 @azbabydoll0077 @ccrdr1963 @Acwright @Rick21 @tfriel @Pattipeg @Bernies4u @jimmyd @thegurns @Gildon58 @Ediehg @Lindac66 @Ozarkpd120 @msbham @MaryLillian @MyLove23 @Positivevibes @janocub9 @Cstroup2126 @Moncivais56?! @WayneC @Musicman @Rosiwa72 @Tarainonecarr @grandpapaul @Byronsgirl1 @SaraiR @Clejda @Beenie321 @Rbcmd72 @Karkar @Thomasine @Gemini57 @Vaguemissi @Valnecia72 @Lah2023 @Queenb76 @Dalrph @BtayByrd02 @Lorac1952 @CherieS @Tammyjane @LindaGlidewell @Kim761 @Kimf522 @delaneydon08 @Austinsmom @Dfhegwood @Grettel @ishlicense
You’re not alone in this. Let’s share and support each other. Your story might be the one someone else needs to hear.
Take care,
Somya from the Carenity team 🌼