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Do you feel like things will never get better?

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ayoubalharchal

07/10/2022 at 12:41 AM

ayoubalharchal

Last activity on 07/18/2022 at 1:56 PM

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10 comments posted | 9 in the Depression Forum

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Alright, yesterday I made a post about some negative ways of thinking that cause us all kinds of mental pain.

Each few days I’ll be tell you how you can overcome one of them, alright?

So, for this day, we’ll be talking about the first, which is “over-generalization”.

1. What is over-generalization?

If you overgeneralize, you say something ‘inappropriate’ and think you’re socially dumb. One bad date with an older woman means that all older women will find you shallow and inexperienced. One wobbly table means that you’ll never master furniture making. One misspelling means that you’re illiterate.

2. How to know if you’re doing it?

You can tell that you’re overgeneralizing when your mind uses these words: “never,” “always,” “all,” “every,” “none,” “no one,” “nobody,” “everyone,” “everybody.”

“I always screw up.” “I never get to work on time.” “Nobody really cares for me.” “Everybody thinks I’m awkward.”

3. How to end it?

To fight overgeneralizations, first get rid of absolute terms such as “all,” “every,” “none,” “nobody,” “everybody,” “never,” “always,” and so on. Pay special attention to the rules about being specific and balanced.

Finally, avoid statements about the future—you have no way of predicting the future. Here are some examples:

• What evidence have I got for that conclusion?

• Do I really have enough data to make a rule?

• What other conclusion could this evidence support? What else could it mean?

• How can I check this conclusion?

• No absolutes—quantify exactly.

• I can’t predict the future.

Helpful: Write these questions on a piece of paper or screenshot the whole post and read this stuff every single day until this becomes a habit.

Do it Now: think of a thought you have and ask yourself these questions to get rid of it.

And let me know how things work out :D

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tator1999

08/05/2022 at 11:22 PM

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tator1999

Last activity on 11/27/2024 at 1:57 AM

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40 comments posted | 27 in the Depression Forum

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No I don’t think anything will improve just tired of hurting all the time and can’t get my health issues like chronic heart failure and chronic respiratory failure makes me feel like I’m a failure and I can’t really do anything about it can’t catch a good break always struggling for basic needs just to much to deal with

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tatorhead1999

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-05 23:22:10

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Doug_RVA

08/06/2022 at 4:03 AM

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Doug_RVA

Last activity on 12/08/2023 at 1:37 AM

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16 comments posted | 12 in the Depression Forum

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@tator1999

Good evening tator1999!

Thank you for posting here! That in and of itself shows you are not a failure! You opened your heart and soul to us - something that takes true courage - something a failure would not be able to do! 👏

You most definitely are in a bad time right now. You have so very much to deal with and it is overwhelming. With all you are dealing with, it is easy to give up hope.

Please, do NOT give up hope!

There have been so many times in my life when I felt and believed I was a complete failure and that there was no hope for me. My physical problems did not help with the situation. But, things have very definitely gotten better for me over the years.

I am 68 years young and have been depressed for most of my life. And, at certain points in my life, I came close to totally giving up.

Things have changed, yes. But, it has taken a hell of a lot of work on my part. And, after getting much, much better, it does take a lot of awareness on my part so I do not crash.

The work, however, is not something that needs to be done all at once. I have had much better luck when I have just dealt with one small thing rather than being overwhelmed with the whole situation.

As a friend of mine asked, “How do you eat a cow?” 🐂 (Of course, I wondered what eating a cow had to do with the situation! 🤔) His answer, “One hamburger at a time!” 🍔

In other words, I do not have to handle everything at once.

There were times I celebrated simply getting out of bed and making it to work! There were times I celebrated making it through an evening and not doing something drastic.

Things do improve. But, we need to be patient and loving with ourselves, taking the little steps we need to take. As I found out, it took years for me to get into my horrible mental situation. It was not going to be solve instantly. So, I had to be patient with myself and realize I just had to love myself and slowly move forward.

I hope there may be something helpful for you in what I have written.

But, in any case, know that you are NOT a failure!

Know that you ARE loved!

Know that you are NOT alone!

Know that things DO improve!

I send you a great big hug and lots of prayers!

🙏❤🌻

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“The universe wouldn't be complete if it weren't for the fact that you happen to be here." --- Deepak Chopra

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-06 04:03:50

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tator1999

08/06/2022 at 2:25 PM

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tator1999

Last activity on 11/27/2024 at 1:57 AM

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40 comments posted | 27 in the Depression Forum

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Thank you for your hugs will try to do all I can but it does get overwhelming like you said hope you have a great day

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tatorhead1999

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-06 14:25:15

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Doug_RVA

08/06/2022 at 11:15 PM

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Doug_RVA

Last activity on 12/08/2023 at 1:37 AM

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16 comments posted | 12 in the Depression Forum

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@tator1999

You are most welcome!

My day is going well, thank you! And, I hope your day has at least a little bit more hope in it!

Please remember, as Deepak Chopra writes,

"The universe wouldn't be complete if it weren't for the fact that you happen to be here."

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“The universe wouldn't be complete if it weren't for the fact that you happen to be here." --- Deepak Chopra

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-06 23:15:26

Doug_RVA

08/12/2022 at 3:09 AM

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Doug_RVA

Last activity on 12/08/2023 at 1:37 AM

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16 comments posted | 12 in the Depression Forum

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@tator1999

Greetings!

I hope you are doing OK!

Life can be so difficult at times - to say the least! But, it helps to remember we are not alone. There are so many people who love us - people that we do not even know in person.

Never give up hope my dear friend!

Sending an extra big hug!

“Wherever the sun goes / The sunflower will follow / Through all of the pain / And all of the sorrow.” – Londrelle

🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

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“The universe wouldn't be complete if it weren't for the fact that you happen to be here." --- Deepak Chopra

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-12 03:09:08

tator1999

08/15/2022 at 3:15 AM

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tator1999

Last activity on 11/27/2024 at 1:57 AM

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40 comments posted | 27 in the Depression Forum

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@Doug_RVA

I don’t see it any better they changed my antibiotics again all I wanna do is cry but I know it really want help or change outcome I just wander if my life still has any meaning trying not to give up but some days are better than others

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tatorhead1999

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-15 03:15:33

Doug_RVA

08/17/2022 at 6:07 PM

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Doug_RVA

Last activity on 12/08/2023 at 1:37 AM

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16 comments posted | 12 in the Depression Forum

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@tator1999

Greetings tator1999!

I am sorry you have gotten another infection!

I definitely understand how hopeless things seem at this moment. You have so many things happening at once.

I have been in that situation myself and know it is, to say the least, pure hell. For me, there were several times when it was a very close call that I even decided to live and not give up hope.

As much as I wanted a quick solution, and got very frustrated and angry when there wasn’t one, I had to give myself a break. Not only did I want a quick solution so as to not have any more problems; as a perfectionist I thought I should, and could, fix myself all at once. When I couldn’t do that, it just made me more frustrated and angry - again questioning if it was worthwhile to continue.

For me, just knowing I wasn’t alone helped.

Many specific things helped me: God, beloved friends, therapy, medication from a psychiatrist, and different support groups.

Please be good to yourself and do not give up hope!

I am doing well; thank you for asking!

And, please know that having the opportunity to exchange messages with you has been helping me!

“Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”

~ DESMOND TUTU

🌻🙏🏻😊

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“The universe wouldn't be complete if it weren't for the fact that you happen to be here." --- Deepak Chopra

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-17 18:07:35

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tator1999

08/12/2022 at 3:14 AM

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tator1999

Last activity on 11/27/2024 at 1:57 AM

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Thank you for checking in on me got another infection waiting on results really tired of feeling bad just trying to keep in a state of mind that’s good hope your ok to

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tatorhead1999

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-08-12 03:14:31

hundal

09/28/2022 at 2:31 PM

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hundal

Last activity on 03/31/2023 at 9:02 AM

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174 comments posted | 24 in the Depression Forum

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Never give up hope my dear friend, All will be fine one day.

Do you feel like things will never get better? https://www.carenity.us/forum/depression/living-with-depression/do-you-feel-like-things-will-never-get-better-4581 2022-09-28 14:31:07

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