I really don't feel like living - need support and to talk

 I associate pain with love because my primary caregiver as a child hurt me, but said "would love me forever". 

Just a weird realization I had and wanted to share and this seems like a safe place to do that😊

Hope y'all are having a good day!

Has anyone here been able to get disability for depression.. I struggle daily just to get up and go to work.. I hate my job and wonder how long I will be able to do it.. I am afraid I will get fired.. Is it possible to get disability for depression?

I am going to keep it short and simple NEVER GIVE UP ON LIFE.  LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME TO BE DEAD. So lets live and make the best of what life has to offer.

I really dont feel like living anymore

@Heartache oh bless your heart. May I ask how long you have been married? Even just roughly  if that's too personal?

@Lynettsirry hi. I'm Carnation. I understand so much of what you're saying here. Especially how others can think that we should feel a certain way. We cannot help it sometimes. We feel what we feel and if life overwhelms us there should not be any judgment from others on that. I'm glad you posted. I'm very lonely too. 

The fact of the matter is that SUICIDE does not solve anything instead it leaves a lot of people in so much pain those loved ones you leave behind family and friends, parents, and siblings are left to bear the unbearable pain of losing a loved one to SUICIDE.  It is in our instinct to choose life over death no matter how hard life can get don't ever lose hope because it is hope that will find a way to better your situation every problem has a solution we just have to search for it don't quit on yourself give yourself  another chance once again I say LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL

OMG people all this negativity this is not what I thought this platform was about this platform I thought was to cheer each other lift our spirits but all this talk about wanting to die only triggers my depression and makes me feel helpless because there is nothing I can say or express in writing that can change your minds.

Hello everyone, I just wanted to thank everyone for sharing their stories and feelings with us here. It's really important when you have depression to know that you are not alone. Let's continue to be there for one another! 

We just published an article that I think you all may find helpful: Testimonial: Gradually Sinking into Depression

Who do you reach out to or what do you do when you're feeling your lowest? Do you have an outlet that helps you to cope with you depression?

Feel free to share here, we're all here to support one another!

Take care,
Courtney

hi. Felt to respond a little to the person who mentioned "all of the negativity" that seems to lurk here. From my experience, no one in my own life or family, no one touchable, gets it or wants to hear about it - the pain that runs so deeply, that is. I think that at least for me, here, I, and perhaps other people here are SO very lonely and feel SO immensely shut out of "the land of the living" so to speak, and that there is so much gunk that has to get out of us first, that we just cry out,f  deep deep inside, for people to listen, to relate. I understand in one way what the person meant about negativity but I feel that means that he or she might be on a more ready playing field if that makes sense at all. Most of us here are absolutely shattered. And we need to know we aren't alone. And if that means getting the gunk out for a season as opposed to something even worse, then I think that is why this platform is here. I'm wrong a lot so perhaps I've missed the mark here. It's just from my own experienced. I've been abandoned by my family. My own sister told me coldly, not lovingly, but coldly, to "call a 1-800 number".  I found you guys here. And if I were censored and always had to feign happiness, I just don't know if I could make it anymore. I don't know how to conclude this so will just hush now. -C.