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Teenage heartbreak
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castledepress
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castledepress
Last activity on 09/25/2023 at 1:37 AM
Joined in 2020
152 comments posted | 120 in the Living with depression group
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i know the feeling, it took me almost 6 months to actually open up to my first therapist, probably even longer. I just kind of stared at the bookshelf for months before I said a word. I just knew that I had to be there and keep coming because the third rail of the subway tracks was looking better and better as an alternative to the hell I was going through in my mind.
I would love to see your lyrics, and I'll show you some of my photography. I don't share very well either. We can do an equal exchange.
Kenzie22
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Kenzie22
Last activity on 10/03/2022 at 6:16 PM
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141 comments posted | 102 in the Living with depression group
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@castledepress Yes that would be nice if we could
castledepress
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castledepress
Last activity on 09/25/2023 at 1:37 AM
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152 comments posted | 120 in the Living with depression group
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I'll start......
Kenzie22
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Kenzie22
Last activity on 10/03/2022 at 6:16 PM
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141 comments posted | 102 in the Living with depression group
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@castledepress Oh wow, those are nice. I'll just quote a part of one of my raps here: " Dear mom, I always thought that you was the bomb, until you started beating me you said it was yuh job, but I didn't understand none of my friends had to deal with that, so I just faced the fact that you didn't love me, you wanted to abuse me you practically used me, you made me clean that nasty house time after time and I would just ask why and you say this your life, I try to do everything to go hangout with my friends, but you wouldn't even let me talk to my cousin, I wanted to be happy, but you didn't care, you wouldn't even let me see my grandma here or there and you know it's the truth, the last time I said goodbye was at her funeral, I mean I can't even breathe, I just wanna die, I pray at night and I just ask god why, like she give me this struggle she give me this pain, I feel like my minds about to go insane, I mean you got me in my feelings and it's got to stop, I feel like imma drop, I'm bout to end my life, like why? Do you want me to die, because I'm not going to survive when I try to do a simple thing like commit a suicide." That's one I wrote a while ago, but I bolded only the rap.
castledepress
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castledepress
Last activity on 09/25/2023 at 1:37 AM
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152 comments posted | 120 in the Living with depression group
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Extremely powerful. They say that great art comes from pain, but I'm sorry you have to go through this. Really great lyrics though, you say an awful lot with them. Your rhyming and cadence are really perfect, poetic. Does she really physically beat you? Hugs, no one deserves that. Btw did you find out about the pregnancy yet?
Kenzie22
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Kenzie22
Last activity on 10/03/2022 at 6:16 PM
Joined in 2020
141 comments posted | 102 in the Living with depression group
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@castledepress I'm finding out Friday, thank god, and she doesn't beat me anymore. She just started whooping me with her shoe again, so she will most likely start hitting me again. Monday I went to school with a swollen and red hand cause she wouldn't stop whooping me in the morning and I put my hands to get her away and she started hitting my hands too. She put my hand on the dog cage and bang it on there, that's the main reason it was swollen, but that's not that bad tho. When she was abusing me, she would back me up In a corner and beat me up. The next day I would go to school all bruised up and crying in the morning cause she would beat me up before school also. She tried to kill me 2. I told on her multiple times and they never believed me, she would get my aunt to defend her and say that "I was delusional", I guess punching and trying to kill your child is a way of discipline now. I'm older now tho, not too long ago she tried to back me up in the corner like she use to and I would cover my face and scream and cry, well this time I yelled at her and told her to "get the fuck away from me".
castledepress
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castledepress
Last activity on 09/25/2023 at 1:37 AM
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152 comments posted | 120 in the Living with depression group
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@Kenzie22 Do you have some kind of counseling service at school you can go to? Or somewhere else? This isn't acceptable. You are being physically beaten, you need to get out of there or get help. Your mother is an abuser. Is there a way to get to your father? Before you do anything else this issue needs to be addressed because it's not going to go away. Your mother is a violent person and isn't going to change because she's gotten away with it so far. Do you feel safe with your father? Is there anywhere else you can go?
castledepress
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castledepress
Last activity on 09/25/2023 at 1:37 AM
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152 comments posted | 120 in the Living with depression group
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@Kenzie22 Yeah, you need to get out of where you are or the depression and heartbreak is going to get worse.
Kenzie22
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Kenzie22
Last activity on 10/03/2022 at 6:16 PM
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141 comments posted | 102 in the Living with depression group
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@castledepress Well, my dad left cause he hates my mom. The last time I saw him he said "this is why I hate being around because your mom always wants to be involved", she wouldn't let him be in my life because she wanted him to be in her life also, and she blames me for the reason he left which isn't true, but imma be 18 in 2 years. I mean I made it this long, I think I can make 2 more years to get out. I don't trust school counselors.
Courtney_J
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Courtney_J
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Last activity on 08/08/2022 at 11:09 AM
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1,340 comments posted | 134 in the Living with depression group
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@Kenzie22 Hi Kenzie22, it sounds like you've been going through a lot, thank you for opening up to us. Please know that if you ever feel unsafe at home, there are resources and people out there to help you.
The National Domestic Abuse Hotline is available 24/7 online or by phone, and their advocates can provide confidential, non-judgmental advice and support. They are a really great resource for advice and general information on abuse. You can call them at any hour of the day at 800-799-SAFE(7233) or online here.
Again, we're all here for you on Carenity!
Take care,
Courtney
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Courtney_J, Community Manager, Carenity US
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Kenzie22
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Kenzie22
Last activity on 10/03/2022 at 6:16 PM
Joined in 2020
141 comments posted | 102 in the Living with depression group
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Anyone want to talk about depression from heartbreak?