I really don't feel like living - need support and to talk

@Hidden username ive never heard anyone describe it that perfectly before you get tired of hearing " i dont want to hear it" and "im too stressed out to deal with you" or my personal fd up favorite " people out there are worse off than you" like i understand than but we're supposed to be family and close we should be able to confide in one another and when we cant it makes you feel so alone like no one cares when all you do is try to be there for everyone else and for what? So they cant treat you as though you don't matter. Well im always here for you

I'm a teenager. I know I'm probably "too young" for this site officially, but I really need help!!! I hate my life. I want to die. Nobody would notice if I died. They wouldn't care. Why get up in the morning...? Because I don't have a choice!!! When my sister dropped out of school, they didn't say a word. She dropped out because the school was too religious for her, and the kids were "too clicky". But me? This year is hell at school and at home, but does anyone care?? My "parents" know I hate school. If I stay home even one day, my "dad" freaks out, even if it's for my period. At school, I'm quiet, shy, no friends... I just moved in August 2017, and it's so hard for me!!! I want to go home!!!!! At home, I had so many friends, (or I thought I did...), I was loud, (not popular tho), and I was able to be myself. Here, the second I step out of my house, (or maybe when I leave my bed), I shut off emotionally. I can't feel anything, I can't talk normally, I'm socially-awkward, and I have social-anxiety. Nobody understands me. My therapist thinks I'm just naturally socially-awkward. She doesnt know the real me. Nobody does. I just want all of this shit to end. I don't care how... if I do go to hell for killing myself, I know hell is a lot better than hell on earth!!!

I am struggling with depression but I have found two ways that help. A lot of this depends on how you feel about God and faith and stuff. And even with my faith I still struggle with depression. First, is trusting that the Lord has a purpose AND WAITING for it to be revealed - that's the hard part. Second, while you are waiting for things to change HELP SOMEONE ELSE. Believe it or not, when you help others in need, it will help you. Volunteer. Help a neighbor who cannot cut their grass or do things for themselves. Once you find a purpose, you will find that your depression isn't as bad as it was before. Meds help sometimes, but not always. 

@Freablayloosheeng975 We all experience sadness in different ways. Being shy and feeling awkward doesn't help I know. But don't give up. You still have a lot of life ahead of you. You need to find purpose, some activities you enjoy. Maybe if you get involved in some activities you can find friends with similar interests.

If you need someone to talk to about your thoughts of suicide please call the Suicide Prevention Hotline:1-800-273-8255. They have trained volunteers 24 hours everyday. Your life does matter.

@Hidden username I know it may not seem like it now but God does love you. I know what you mean about not getting more than we can handle. The thing we forget is that God has not abandoned us. We don't understand or like things going on in our lives but these trials are temporary. These feelings of confusion and doubt are not from God. We need to trust Him. Pray for help. Ask Him to send someone you can trust and who will listen. Don't give up.

I’ve been there too. It was part of my survey. I’m alone now. Family doesn’t even want to deal with it. 

You guys have to hold on to God, it speaks of when Man fails us God is there. God knows your strength better than you.. God want Bold people at the throne, not weak people.. so at some point we have to walk with him and get quite enough to hear him.. trust me he loves everyone and God never said it will be easy! Just trust the process... read your Bible daily and constantly ask God for renewing of the mind 

@Hidden username God will never put more on us than we can handle ... if we realize we aren't doing it alone. We sometimes forget we need Him or people He puts in our lives. It's not easy and people let us down sometimes. The enemy, Satan, wants us defeated, deceived and feeling hopeless. We may not see light at the end of the tunnel right now but we need to keep trusting God ...

What do you two think about people who cave? Who either attempt or succeed at suicide? Other than leaning on God especially if evil is messing with your life (and I’m not talking about anything you can probably imagine and it’s not minor, or health related)?

sometimes it takes a village. Sometimes medication is necessary. Often counseling is helpful ... neither of which is weak. After all it’s our brains that came up with medicines and psychological practices and sometimes you need that help. Some people don’t believe in God. I’m not one of them but I utilize everything at hand. Stigma for mental illness has been around forever. Please don’t tell people “to just deal with it”. 

AMEN